the price of being me

there are dark nights of my life that i want to drown in pain. I feel hopeless with no direction. Felt that big empty space ahead of me. I wish I have the reason to live, reason to breath and reason to exist. My tears are all dried out. I can't let them go, I know theirs no one to catch them. I'll be miserable and half dead. Why do I always ask what did I live for if i have no reason to. Forget being fair, never mind my worth 'cuz maybe I should have not been conceived if the only thing that's telling me I'm alive is the pain I'm enduring endlessly.